My Choice

Today I wanted to talk a little bit about the decision I made to choose CBT instead of/combined with medication and how I view my Illnesses.

When I sat in the Dr's to discuss my options I had already made my mind up that I didn't want medication such as antidepressants or beta blockers. My anxiety makes everyday situations hard, it makes me paranoid, it makes me depressed. But, it also makes me incredibly organised, it makes me more understanding, it makes me caring. I am a determined person and to me by taking drugs that would change the way my brain worked was scary, I hate admitting defeat and to me that's what it felt like.

For some people, it is the right choice to choose medication and I fully support anyone who wants to make that choice. However, I wanted to manage my anxiety and not lose the positives it brings into my life, so I chose CBT. I felt this would allow me to understand how my brain worked and how my anxiety worked, if I could manage it then I could turn it into a positive. I wanted to win, I want to feel in control of how my own mind works.

CBT has allowed me to understand how my anxiety works, so now I can almost predict when a rough patch is coming (My anxiety and depression fluctuate), when a rough patch is coming everyday situations will start getting harder, a situation I coped with a week earlier may become a lot more difficult.

When I start seeing these things happening I can immediately start to use methods to calm it, I can try pinpointing if there is a cause to why I'm starting to get sick. I can also start using a lot of mindfulness techniques, I find an app called Headspace really helpful, as well as self love. Self love is ridiculously important, especially when the depression kicks in and those thoughts start. My favourite ways to practice this are : HUGE bubble baths (especially with lush bath bombs); lots of blankets; endless cups of tea; my favourite food and cuddles with either the cat or anyone willing.
© http://therumpus.net

" The greatest thing you will ever learn is just to love and be loved in return " ~ David Bowie


Lucy :) x

Comments

Popular Posts